Reaction

When life hits me hard.... I obsess about things that really don't matter.

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I wonder what the Pilgrims did when they were having stress at their jobs (jobs like...blacksmith... butter... churner? I don't know) and drama with their families.

Oh wait, they were so busy staying alive that they probably didn't have the chance to think about their expectations at work or the quality of their family relationships. Riiiiggghhhttt. So, apparently I'm stressed because life has been TOO bountiful. I think there's something to that.

Too bad I don't have a shelter to build or food to scavenge for. The jalapeno chips in my drawer are within arm's reach. Because I'm stressed and all my basic needs are met, I have been instead obsessing about finding the perfect new pair of boots, perfect Christmas gifts for everyone, perfect dessert recipes for Thanksgiving, perfect level of cleanliness in the house..... stuff that really..... doesn't......  matter. I feel out of control in some areas of my life, so I exert UBER control over meaningless things.

So, in light of that, I'm really excited to hide in my kitchen this weekend and bake. I might even need to make a trip to the kitchen store to buy things I've never owned -- like a pastry/piping bag and mini-bundt pans. #morethingsthatdon'tmatter

Last weekend, when I could hardly stand to be around the thoughts in my head, Tim and I went to Half Price Books and I sat on the floor in the cookbook aisle to be with my friends, namely Nigella Lawson. I picked up "How to be a Domestic Goddess" and started flipping through the pages, only stopping once to move my pile out of the way of an old man who was standing wayyyy too close to me while he waited for his wife to find her book. The title of the book was ironic on purpose. The way Nigella writes, the point is NOT to be a domestic goddess (which is good, because I don't need one more thing to stress about) but rather, creating an experience and creating comfort with the food you make, and the way you make it.

When I'm really struggling with the big questions of my life, my mental happy place is in pages like those. It just paints this picture in my mind of tradition, warmth, love, satisfaction..... things that when I'm stressed, I feel like I'm REALLY lacking. Nigella Lawson won't solve my problems, but she can take the edge off for me when I'm waiting to make my next move. The way she approaches cooking and entertaining is a good reminder for me when I'm approaching my problems -- handle them with realism, some practical indulgence (oh yes, Nigella makes that statement possible) and a lot of humor.

I tend to forget that.

Anyway, that's all I've got. The holidays are upon us, I've got dessert recipes to bury myself in, and does anyone know where I can buy a can of chestnuts? Seriously. Canned chestnuts. I need them to enjoy chocolate the way Nigella does.

Anyone?